The TV Zone

Fans can’t say NBC isn’t working hard to sell “Friday Night Lights” to new fans. The network is spreading episodes of the riveting portrait of contemporary family and community life all over the place -- on-air, online, on DVD, on iTunes.

This Saturday night, NBC airs three episodes 8-11 p.m. (in high-def, too). They’re the season’s compelling final hours -- “Mud Bowl,” “Best Laid Plans,” and “State” -- when Kyle Chandler’s coach finds his family life and career turned upside down, when paraplegic ex-QB Jason moves out on his own, when secrets are revealed and relationships tested. Prime stuff.

All 22 first-season episodes are still streaming online, too. (NBC also offers two-minute recaps condensing the gist of each outing.)

That season’s DVD set was just released at a bargain list price of $30 (widely discounted to the $20 range), and includes an intimate glimpse of life behind-the-scenes at the series’ Texas production location.

Downloadable episodes are still on iTunes, too (but not, apparently, for long; NBC has announced plans to pull its content off the iTunes platform).

NBC launches the show's second season Oct. 5.

So it’s two months early.

With director Rob Zombie’s “Halloween” remake opening today in theaters, VOOM’s Monsters HD channel is running the 1978 original that made Jamie Lee Curtis a star, in high-def, of course, tonight at 11 p.m. (The trailer is playing on the Monsters HD home page.)

It’s followed at 12:30 a.m. by Curtis’ 1981 sequel “Halloween II,” and then “Halloween 3: Season of the Witch” (2:05 a.m.), “Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers” (3:45 a.m.) and “Halloween 5: The Revenge of Michael Myers” (5:15 a.m.).

Rob Zombie has a regular TV gig, too, hosting TCM’s Underground showcase of weird, wild and warped flicks late every Friday night. It’s actually on hiatus for August’s Summer With the Stars event, but returns late Sept. 7 with the young Francis Coppola’s 1963 shocker “Dementia 13” (2 a.m.), followed by William Castle’s 1961 “Homicidal” (3:30 a.m.).

Ken Jennings and other game show champs will chat online with viewers after tomorrow’s installment of the all-star competition “Grand Slam” (Saturday at 7 p.m., GSN), hosted by Dennis Miller.

The 8 p.m. chat features the four semi-final round participants: No. 2 seed Ken Jennings (“Jeopardy”) vs. No. 14 seed Michelle Kitt (“The Weakest Link”), and No. 5 seed David Legler (“Twenty One”) vs. No. 9 seed Ogi Ogas (“Millionaire”).

Couldn't he have just told ONE of us to stick it where the sun don't shine?

Well, I've gone and done it again - oversold an interview that I thought would be combustible, combative, and completely, colossally confrontational.

How completely colossally wrong I was (See below...way below.)

I speak of Larry David, who at the recent press tour came to verbal blows with reporters - oh joy! - but during a Tuesday conference call couldn't have been nicer.

It was just awful. Terribly disappointing.

Maybe HBO told him to act nice so those writers would say nice stuff about the new season of "Curb Your Enthusiasm," which starts next Sunday. If so, bad advice, because they always do anyway. And for the record, the first episode of the new season is, in fact, pretty funny, but the second one has problems and no reason now to get into details except to say that it concerns the certain character flaw of a certain leading character but which seems (ummm) completely out of character. Sen. Barbara Boxer also appears in one of the episodes – LD says he had approached her about making the cameo.

What else did LD say?

Let's get right to it. Had he ever thought about adopting a black family after Katrina (which effectively forms the plot of the entire season)?

"Considered it...for maybe half a second."

Will he retire at the end of this season?

"I do that [predict my exit] every year, even during 'Seinfeld.' It's the only way I can get through the season. I have to convince myself [that it's over.] I'm convincing. I've convinced everyone. [This] could be my last. I don't know. I'm really happy with the season, had a fantastic time. I don't know. I'll need a month...I'm going to be dating. I'm just kidding."

Why was he – gasp - on "Hannah Montana" recently?

"My kids are huge 'Hannah Montana' fans’" so, like a good father with connections, he took them to a show taping, was spotted by the executive producer, was asked to appear in a future episode, and like a good father with suddenly better connections, agreed.

What was the experience of doing a cameo on a teenybopper megahit like, especially for a snarling misanthrope like yourself?

"I was mortified."

Here are more tidbits: This season a black family named the Blacks moves in with the Davids after their home is wrecked in a hurricane - Vivica Fox is mom. LD: "I just remember that after Katrina some people were taking in some of these homeless families and it doesn't take a genius to say that could be a funny idea for me."

And casting news: Shelley Berman is back (for one episode) and so is Ted Danson (probably for four.) John McEnroe makes a guest appearance - "I used to be called the McEnroe of comics because I screamed the audiences [when he did standup]." Lucy Lawless and Steve Coogan appear as well (and no, LD has not been reading TMZ and was completely unaware that Coogan had been implicated in the Owen Wilson mess.)

NBC has started streaming “Late Night With Conan O’Brien” on a next-day basis. Episodes can be viewed here after about 3 p.m. the afternoon after they air.

Already online are this week’s shows with Bob Saget (Monday night), Jeff Goldblum (Tuesday night) and Kelly Preston (Wednesday night).

Upcoming guests include Friday night’s Scarlett Johansson and Tuesday’s David Duchovny and Tim Gunn. (Monday’s a repeat.)

The networks are still trying to stir up interest (some interest, any interest) in a slate of new fall series that haven’t as yet generated much buzz.

They’ve put together on-air preview shows filled with clips and interviews to razzle-dazzle us into a sense of anticipation.

Some upcoming airings (with online viewing links):

“NBC Primetime Preview Party” (on WNBC/4) – Saturday at 5 a.m. and 1:30 p.m.; Saturday Sept. 8 at 8:30 p.m. (Also on Sci Fi: Sunday Sept. 9 at 10 a.m.)

“Fox Fall Preview” (on WNYW/5) – Sunday at 7 p.m., late Friday night Sept. 7 at 1 a.m., Sunday Sept. 9 at 1 p.m.

“CW Fall Preview” (on WPIX/11) – very early Tuesday-Wednesday at 2:30 a.m., early next Thursday-Friday at 4 a.m., Saturday Sept. 8 at 5:30 p.m., Sunday Sept. 9 at 10 a.m.

ABC has actually produced three separate half-hour sneak-peeks, but they haven't shown up in WABC/7 listings. ABC fall clips can be found online. CBS new-show previews are also online.

Friday nights and Saturday mornings on Cartoon Network are now under the control of a 10-year-old “superfan” named Blake.

Blake hosts a new block called Fried Dynamite (Friday 7-11 p.m., Saturday 9 a.m.-noon) starting this Labor Day weekend. Friday primetime holds the movie “Chill Out Scooby-Doo” and a new episode of “My Gym Partner’s a Monkey,” while Saturday is devoted to action-adventure.

Cartoon claims “Blake's a normal kid who talked himself into a sweet gig hosting Fried Dynamite.” (Of course, it’s already clear from web chat that Blake’s an actor, and among his “friends” is B5 boy-bander Bryan Breeding.) “Not only does he get his own office space at Cartoon Network headquarters, but he and his friends have behind-the-scenes access to show creators, voice actors and pretty much anyone else who makes things happen . . . Blake will also be sent on the road to cover the latest trends and events that interest kids.”

Kid viewers of Fried Dynamite are also being asked to send in their own photos, drawings and videos for possible airing on the block.

Bulletin! Dave Letterman will appear on "The Oprah Winfrey Show."

This is big news.

This is huge news.

Here's why: Back around the Dec. 1 2005 "Super Bowl of Love" on "Late Show," when O finally appeared and ended that long-standing silly "feud," she asked if he'd come on her show.

Dave declined, saying this: “Here’s what would happen: I would go on the ‘Oprah’ show, and I would break down and sob like a little girl ... I don’t want to have that happen. I’d feel ridiculous. I’d never be able to live that down, that Oprah would make me sob.”

Dave will appear on the Sept. 10 edition to be taped at Madison Square Garden. It may well be a Nine Eleven-themed edition (the one taped at MSG the following day obviously is) which could mean this will mark a rare - dare we say unprecedented - public appearance by Letterman in which he'll have to be SERIOUS. What can fans expect?

First of all, Letterman's a deeply serious, thoughtful guy, believe it or not. I know - I interviewed him some years ago, and the longish chat was unleavened by a single joke, quip or crack. He's intense, brutal on himself, and almost pathologically HONEST. In other words, if Oprah asks him something, he won't BS his way out of an answer. (And of course his own Nine Eleven shows were TV landmarks in their own right.)

What are some logical questions? Here are some I'd like to hear answers to:

* What did Nine Eleven mean to you?

* You always talk about your mother, but never about your dad [who died some years ago]. Why? What was he like? What sort of relationship did you have with him?

* And what about your sister - does she still live in Florida? How do you guys get along?

* Did you ever get married, and - if not - how does Regina [maybe-wife] feel about this unconventional relationship?

* Do you want another kid?

* How will you explain to Harry what you do for a living when he's old enough to understand?

* Will you ever take Harry fishing, or maybe read him "Harry Potter?" How will you explain the facts of life to him?

* Do you ever get depressed? If so, why Dave?

* What moves you to tears?

* Do you ever plan to retire to Montana and disappear for good?

Oprah, you have my permission to use any of these questions. They're not copyrighted. But please, ask just one of them. I'd actually like to see Dave sob on your show.

If they can dance, sing duets, ice-skate and play “The Mole,” they might as well try rapping.

“Celebrity Rap Superstar” debuts on MTV Thursday night (10 p.m.) as a (nearly) live competition series featuring such celebs as rocker Sebastian Bach, “Parkers” star Countess Vaughn, gossip blogger Perez Hilton, NFLer Jamal Anderson, “Hills” bad boy Jason Wahler, Playboy babe Kendra Wilkinson and others hoping they can hip-hop into viewers’ hearts.

Mentored by such pros as Tone Loc, Redman and MC Lyte, the celeb wannabes will try to wow judges including DMC, Da Brat and Big Boy, as well as a studio audience (taping in Los Angeles; sorry, New Yorkers).

Follow the action via MTV on-air, online and in “Celebrity Rap Superstar's” Remote Control blog.

The re-invention of the re-invention (of the re-invention) of Katie Couric begins tonight, and just in time for those spate of first anniversary pieces that'll start popping up in newspapers next week.

She heads to Iraq tonight where she'll report (and anchor) from Baghdad and Syria.

The putative reason for tonight's big trip? To advance Gen. David Petraeus's status report on the war, to be released to Congress in September.

Katie told David Bauder of the Associated Press last night, "you can't help but get a very detached perspective when you're not there and you're not witnessing things firsthand. . . . I'm curious about very basic questions regarding living conditions, about how much fear there is in the street, about how the soldiers really are doing."

Why is this trip so interesting? Because Katie had earlier indicated - if not outright declared - that she'd never go to Iraq because of the danger, and that as the mother of two young kids, the personal risk far outweighed any professional reward. She's done plenty of travel on this gig, but she's also reluctant - as, by the way, is ABC's Charlie Gibson - to trek to hot spots simply because they're "hot."

The other interesting thing: Katie and CBS will have to weather a whole batch of stories next week that'll recap her troubled first year in the anchorchair. Now, each of those will have to perfunctorily cite the Iraq trip as evidence of CBS's new-found zeal to harden up the "Evening News" and, by association, Katie.

Goes to Iraq. Now, about those ratings...

Okay fans, we've got the big "Dancing with the Stars" news for you right now: There will be twelve twinkle-toed celebs on the fifth season edition, bowing Sept. 26, making this the biggest twinkle-toed cast to date. And while some of these (well, maybe most) of these names have already leaked out, at least we can now give you the absolute official list. And without further babble, here it is:

Jane Seymour: No intro needed.

Melanie Brown, AKA Scary Spice (of the S Girls).

Sabrina Bryan, from "The Cheetah Girls."

Helio Castroneves, the Indie 500 champ.

Mark Cuban, super rich guy, Dallas Mav owner, and someone who thinks the Internet is overrated.

Jennie Garth, or Valerie, from "What I Like About You" and (of course) Kelly Taylor from "Bev Hills 90210."

Josie Maran, model.

Cameron Mathison, Ryan from "All My Children."

Floyd Mayweather, multi-world-title holder in boxing.

Wayne Newton, again, no intro needed, but here's hint ("Danke Schoen.")

Marie Osmond, sister of you-know-who.

Albert Reed, Ab & Fitch model.

Here’s a little light reading to go with today’s Part 2 story on CBS’ controversial “Kid Nation” reality show, currently scheduled to premiere Sept. 19.

Our friends at The Smoking Gun have unearthed what they say is the contract parents were asked to sign before their kids could go live in a New Mexico ghost town under the tender loving care of TV producers looking for a hit.

It’s a 22-page feast of legalese that leaves the network and producers blameless for anything that might happen to the kiddos, despite the program taking place “in inherently danerous travel areas that may expose the Minor and other participants to,” among other things, crime, drowning and disfigurement.

Enjoy.

Oh man I'm so excited about this news right here and now that I can barely get the words out fast enough but I'll try anyway and without further ado (or without further waste of your valuable time and I guess mine as well) here it is: Larry David's talking to the press tomorrow.

I repeat: Larry David is talking to the press tomorrow. At 2 p.m.. On a conference call. Man the phones!

Why is this so exciting that I can barely get the words out fast enough etc. etc.?

Well I'll tell you why:

Because Larry David thinks the press - the collective We of the Fourth Estate - are the biggest bunch of weanies to have ever drawn a breath and he's not shy about saying so. It makes encounters with Larry David both enervating and exhilarating (go ahead Larry - look THOSE words up) and a little wacky.

I can hardly wait.

You don't believe me? Well, I direct you to this wonderful blog by Miami Herald scribe Glenn Garvin, who was on hand at LD's press tour nuke fest. Rumor has it that afterwards, critics left the Hilton International Ballroom with their hair smoking and burn marks on their faces.

Why is Larry submitting himself to this sublime form of torture? Why else? To promote the new season of “Curb,” which bows Sept. 9.

He likes us. He really likes us.

There are few more indelible - "indelible" as in "horrifying" - images as the one taken of a falling man the morning of Sept. 11, 2001 at the WTC. His head pointed towards the ground, legs slightly bent, he is frozen forever in time, like a Vesuvius victim preserved in ash.

Some people (per the entry on the Falling Man in Wikipedia) have tried to permanently strike the Richard Drew picture from the Nine Eleven photographic record, and if true, their efforts have been ludicrously in vain. If seen once, it's never forgotten.

Simply the words, "falling man," summon it to the mind's eye, and even Don DeLillo wrote a book so entitled. "Falling man" is part of the language, and the picture is part of our lives. I say all this because the Discovery Times Channel (the Gray Lady sold her stake in the network last year) has announced that it will air a Brit documentary based entirely on the Drew photograph on September 10 at 9. (Drew, by the way, is the veteran AP photog who was on hand in the immediate aftermath of the Bobby Kennedy assassination.)

Of course, there's no reason to wait till then to watch this program; the doc's been posted on Youtube for a while, and here it is, right now.... By the way, I'd recommend this version in lieu of the TDC one, which is expected to be cut to an hour.

Jerry Garcia not being available to host “Dead Art,” the VOOM Gallery HD series turned to Twisted Sister's Dee Snider.

Starting Wednesday night at 8:30, our homeboy hosts this 10-part high-def travelogue of “the world’s most visually compelling cemeteries.”

(Which just goes to prove there’s a show in everything.)

The first episode visits Brooklyn's Green-Wood Cemetery, the resting place of such New York notables as the Tiffany family. The fifth episode (Sept. 26) heads to the Bronx's Woodlawn Cemetery, where Duke Ellington and Miles Davis are interred.

Other aesthetically (and historically) interesting locations include L.A.’s Forest Lawn, Tarrytown’s Sleepy Hollow, Paris' Pere Lachaise and New Orleans’ St. Louis #1 and Metairie Cemetery.

It’s not exactly a sneak preview of the second season of NBC’s hit “Heroes,” but fresh footage will be streaming online to prepare fans for new episodes starting Sept. 24.

“Sword Saint” is a five-part web series at the NBC-created web site YamagatoFellowship.org. Supposedly funded by George Takei’s corporate magnate Kaito Nakamura, father of Masi Oka’s Hiro character, the site salutes legendary heroes such as Takezo Kensei. That iconic samurai will be part of Hiro’s fall time-trip back to 17th century Japan.

A “video message” from the elder Nakamura is streaming now (in Japanese), with historical “Sword Saint” adventures yet to come. Narrated (in English) by John Rhys-Davies (“Sliders”), they represent stories told to Hiro as a child.

Other big “Heroes” news includes Tuesday’s release of the first-season DVD and the ongoing Heroes World Tour by the show’s cast and crew. Read more about those here. (The tour stops at Rockefeller Center Tuesday morning.)

Repeats continue on NBC Monday nights at 9. Oka and costar James Kyson Lee (Ando) host tonight’s “Six Months Ago” flashback.

[Above: NBC photo of Masi Oka in Sept. 24 season premiere.]

That's what celebrity-gossip-mongering site TMZ.com says. They've got the supposed list online for the new cast of twinkle-toed contestants hitting ABC Sept. 24.

Good thing billionaire Mark Cuban had that hip replacement.

This fall's "Dancing With the Stars" competitors were supposed to be announced by ABC on Wednesday's "Good Morning America."

Oops.

TMZ says these are them:
Aaron Carter
Wayne Newton
Mark Cuban
Jane Seymour
Tori Spelling
Jennie Garth
Floyd Mayweather Jr.
Lou Ferrigno
Nia Peeples
Richard Quest
Giselle Bundchen
Helio Castroneves
Sabrina Bryan
Mel B (not dancing, but playing a role on the show)

And so goes the rather frantic (of late) game of network news musical chairs: Chip Reid has bolted NBC for CBS News, where he replaces Sharyl Attkisson as Capitol Hill correspondent. She stays at CBS as investigative reporter.

Unless you're keeping count - you are, right - this is one of about a dozen or so high profile network reassignments so far this summer. Reid was a very visible presence on "Nightly News" - he's quite good, too - though I always got the sense that Atkisson was not a particularly prominent nor popular figure within Katie Couric's "Evening News." Reid will bring that sort of square-jawed authority that networks covet, and at a moment when CBS - desperately - needs to get higher visibility on one of TV's most important beats.

Reid's been at NBC for just over a decade, covering Al Gore's campaign, the opening months of the war, and (most recently) both House and Senate. He leaves a network now in the throes of two-dot-oh, which has lead to the (forced) departure of - among others - Stone Phillips.

Only in video heaven, at least for now. The show-opening “host chat” from the first nationally syndicated episode of “Live With Regis and Kathie Lee” (Sept. 5, 1988) is online now at the “Live With Regis and Kelly” site. (You can even compare it to recent host chats of Regis and Kelly.)

It’s part of the show’s 20th-season celebration, Sept. 3-14, which has also been announced to include the return of former host Kathie Lee Gifford for the Sept. 14 show.

Gifford actually joined Regis Philbin in 1985 on WABC’s local “Morning Show,” but the pairing didn’t go national till three years later.

[Photo from E!Online, 2000.]

So I'm on hiatus two weeks - that's "hiatus," friends, and not (I repeat) not cancellation - and the whole world of TV goes up in flames. Can't a guy go on hiatus without TV going up in flames? Can't he? I mean...Seacrest does Emmys, and Simon retires (some day), and Oprah comes to NYC, and Janeane comes to "24," and something called "High School Musical II" is watched by over 180 million teenyboppers (actually just 17 million, though this figure doesn't include repeat viewing) and the best I can tell, Rosie said absolutely nothing that got anyone angry. WHAT IS GOING ON, PEOPLE?!

Let's just go through some of the big news of late August and explain the Meaning of It All:

Bulletin: Oprah will tape the first two episodes of the new season at Madison Square Garden.

The Queen does the Garden for a Nine Eleven theme show, and maybe even Steadman will be there. On second thought...

Bulletin: Bill Moyers calls Karl Rove a Godless Creep. Viewers get mad.

Imagine! Moyers taking off after Rove! Viewers getting mad! (Imagine!) I for one was gobsmacked.

Bulletin: Ryan Seacrest will do the Emmys; promises no jokes.

THANK YOU, Ry. From the bottom of my heart, THANK YOU. What would a Seacrest Emmys telecast WITH jokes be like? An episode of "Anchorwoman."

Bulletin: "Project Runway" starts new line of jewelry, sewing machines, etc., this fall.

Why stop with sewing machines? What about Tim Gunn or Heidi Klum bobble-head dolls. Oops - already available.

Bulletin: Janeane Garofalo joins "24."

Finally, another love interest for Jack besides Chloe.

Bulletin: Kristen Bell joins "Heroes."

And after her character gets nuked, she can finally join "Lost."

Bulletin: "High School Musical II" seen by seventeen million; movie, sewing machine line rumored.

Here's the plot - Troy and Gabriella finally kiss, and Sharpay is annoying. What a world.

Bulletin: Simon Cowell says he'll go off-camera when he turns 50.

He's not fifty already?

Bulletin: Jordin Sparks finally signs a record deal.

Who's Jordin Sparks?

Bulletin: CBS's "Kid Nation" under fire.

The kids were alleged to have prepared their own breakfasts, and forced not to watch "SpongeBob Squarepants" for a solid week. Call Protective Services!

Bulletin: "Anchorwoman" canceled after one episode.

Drat - and Seacrest's cameo was in the SECOND episode.

Displaying one’s knowledge of song lyrics seem to be on folks’ minds a lot this summer, given the success of the karaoke shows, "The Singing Bee" and "Don't Forget the Lyrics."

We, too, have been thinking about song lyrics a lot this summer. But with a tube twist, of course.

So today, we're proud to present for your listening and viewing pleasure three songs that mention TV shows (or stars) in their lyrics:

* WHODUNIT (Tavares, 1977) — In this top-40 r&b; hit, the singer implores a clutch of ‘70s TV gumshoes to find his AWOL girlfriend, including Baretta (“Hey Baretta won’t you please go get her), Kojak (“won’t you bring her back”), Ironside (“Don’t you let her slide”) and McCloud (“for cryin’ out loud... somebody call McCloud”).

:
* WESTERN MOVIES (The Olympics, 1958) — Never could figure out this one: the singer of this L.A. r&b; group proclaims “my baby loves the Western movies,” but what he’s really bitching about are how he can’t tear her away from watching TV shows. And they include: “Wyatt Earp,” “Cheyenne,” “Maverick,” “Sugarfoot,” “Wagon Train” “Adventures of Jim Bowie,” “Have Gun Will Travel,” “Bat Masterson,” “Broken Arrow” “Tales of Wells Fargo”

* PARENTS JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND (DJ Jazzy Jeff & The Fresh Prince, 1988) — Will Smith raps about a ton of teen complaints about his overbearing folks, including “Mom, please put back the bell-bottom ‘Brady Bunch’ trousers.”

If anybody can find me a copy of The Beach Boys singing "Johnny Carson" from their 1977 album "The Beach Boys Love You" -- send it to me asap.

MLB.TV celebrates its fifth anniversary Sunday with a free webcast of the Yankees-Tigers game from Comerica Park. Game time is 1:05 p.m.

The Yankees also played in the first game the online pay service streamed, the Aug. 26, 2002 contest hosting the Rangers.

If you’ve been thinking American troops in Iraq are forgotten men and women, here’s an entire day dedicated to honoring them.

All day Saturday, digital cable/satellite’s Military Channel (a Discovery network) will intersperse “tribute-vignettes” told by soldiers’ loved ones, culminating in the commercial-free 10 p.m. hour special “Tribute to the Troops.”

Earlier Saturday shows include the tour “Arlington National Cemetery With Sen. John McCain” (9 a.m.), five episodes of returning soldiers in “Operation Homecoming” (10 a.m.-3 p.m.), 10 episodes of first-person Iraq tales in “My War Diary” (3-8 p.m.), and two eye-opening hours of “War Wounds” (8-10 p.m.).

Military videos are still being solicited at the channel’s Tributes to the Troops page.

October 15.

That’s the day CBS has picked for the 36th season premiere of “The Price Is Right,” when new host Drew Carey takes over from the legendary Bob Barker.

CBS promises “the familiar set has been refreshed to give it an updated look while keeping the recognizable ‘Price Is Right’ theme and appearance.”

Good thing, since we heard it was falling apart during Barker’s final days.

Aw, gee, already? Fox has canceled its “comedy-reality hybrid” show “Anchorwoman” after a single week (although it did air twice on Wednesday’s premiere night).

Will we never find out whether an airhead model can become a Tyler, Texas, TV news anchor without driving everyone crazy?

Actually, we will, or we can, if we go to the Fox web site video player, where unaired episodes will stream for the few who care.

Fox certainly hopes for better luck in local TV news with its big fall sitcom, "Back to You," starring big-money Kelsey Grammer and Patricia Heaton as feuding reunited anchor-desk partners. That show premieres Sept. 19.

Getting a jump on the competition, Fox has already put the premiere episode of its new fall Monday night drama “K-Ville” online at Fox.com, AOL, Yahoo and other sites.

“K-Ville” dramatizes New Orleans police officers trying to maintain order and some semblance of normal life post-Katrina. Starring as partners are Anthony Anderson (“The Shield”) and Cole Hauser (“High Incident”) [above in Fox photo]. The series debuts on Fox TV stations Sept. 17.

More online video from Fox: this fall’s return of “Prison Break,” or at least the first 17 minutes of it. That show [Fox photo below] starts its third season Sept. 17, leading into “K-Ville.”

Just what anyone needs: a used medical cast.

But this one was on the wrist of Stephen Colbert. And he had his guests on Comedy Central’s weeknightly “Colbert Report” sign it.

You, too, can bid on this stunning wonder, which goes up on eBay after Thursday night’s show. Proceeds will benefit the Yellow Ribbon Fund. The winner will be announced on-air the week of Sept. 10.

Among the autographs you’ll find: Mike Bloomberg, Katie Couric, Bill O'Reilly, Nancy Pelosi, Tim Russert, Tony Snow and Brian Williams.

Colbert broke his wrist June 27 while running around his Manhattan studio.

At least it can if you live in India. This story from London’s Observer is about a reality TV show that puts the likes of “Big Brother” and “The Bachelor” to shame.

“Scholar Hunt, Destination UK,” an Indian prime-time sensation, features teenagers competing for the chance to study at one of five British universities. “The programme is best described,” the Observer writes, “as ‘The Apprentice’ meets ‘The Weakest Link’ with a little of America's sleeper hit ‘Spellbound’ thrown in.”

Arvind Aradhya won a £45,000 ($90,000) scholarship to study engineering at Warwick University, after eight weeks of “demanding exams, tough interviews, a Mastermind-style quiz show, timed questions inside a glass chamber and a final showdown.”

The Observer story includes test questions to see how you’d measure up on “Scholar Hunt.” (I completely bombed out.)

Dominating the ’90s apparently wasn’t enough for the O.J. Simpson legal saga. Now “The Oprah Winfrey Show” has announced its Sept. 13 outing will host a face-to-face between the families of the two murder victims.

The prospective publication of Simpson’s “hypothetical” tale “If I Did It” will be debated by Fred Goldman, Ronald Goldman's father, who now holds rights to the book; Kim Goldman, Ronald Goldman's sister; and Denise Brown, sister of Nicole Brown Simpson.

Brown has called for a boycott of the book, which would be published with a foreward added by the Goldman family. The Goldmans hope to generate some of the multi-million-dollar judgment levied against Simpson in their civil suit.

It’s been a pretty boring season of Top Chef, and last night’s episode was no exception—until it ended with a genuine shocker: Tre was booted.

I cannot imagine what the judges were thinking. Yes Tre was the executive chef of Restaurant April, the losing team in round two of the restaurant wars. As he said in his parting speech, “If an executive chef can’t lead a team to success, then the executive chef is a flop.”

But I can remember other instances where the judges have spared the leader of a losing team because another member was more to blame.

Tre was having an off night, no question. He presided over a lackluster meal and two of the dishes he prepared, the marinated salmon and the bread pudding, were deemed duds. (Ted called the former “a catastrophe,” “disgusting”) But, in his defense, he cooked twice as many dishes as anyone else. And the dishes he didn’t cook were as bad as the ones he didn’t.

Casey’s carrot soup wasn’t an issue, but the judges criticized her monkfish for being overcooked. CJ’s one contribution, a lobster salad, was over-salted. Meanwhile, Brian didn’t cook a thing. Wouldn’t he have been a better candidate for elimination?

We know that the show’s producers, as well as the judges, are in on the elimination decisions, and from a non-culinary perspective, the decision to send Tre packing makes no sense. He’s done well throughout the competition, and is an absolute charmer with his military work ethic and brilliant smile. As an African-American chef, he is also a welcome presence in a world that is largely devoid of black faces.

If the judges had a good reason to get rid of Tre, they didn’t articulate it. This morning I checked the Bravo web site. Tom Colicchio's blog is back. (Anthony Bourdain was spelling him for the last few weeks.)

Tom's blog entry is really a transcription of a conversation he had with Bravo's Andy Cohen. In it, he reveals the judges' reasons for Tre's dismissal:

One of the things we looked at were all the dishes he was responsible for. So we felt the salmon dish was not great universally -- conceptually it was a bad dish. I thought the scallop was good, not great. That beef dish that we'd commented on the day before and said we didn't care for it? He didn't change it! Crusting a filet mignon, as Anthony Bourdain pointed out, is very 80s and not very inventive. He did the same dish exactly the second time around. He was running the kitchen with no intensity, it was very lackadaisical. I never got a sense that they were really pushing it, and they weren't cooking as if their chance of staying in the competition depended on it. I think Tre was responsible for setting that tone.

Well, OK. I guess.

Bourdain, thankfully, is still blogging. He has lots to say about Tre's exit here.

A couple of random thoughts:

Christopher Ciccone? Where did that come from? Did someone at Bravo owe him a favor?

What’s the point of complaining about Dale’s shirt when there’s the matter of his hair?

Will CJ ever stop talking about his lost testicle?

Vanessa Simmons from MTV's "Run's House" starts appearing on CBS’ “Guiding Light” this week as “Lola, a woman with an eye for Remy Boudreau (Lawrence St. Victor),” says the network.

You can watch the daughter of former Run DMC front man Joseph "Rev Run" Simmons on TV weekdays at 10 a.m. on WCBS/2 or online anytime via CBS’ web site.

She’s also online in “Run’s House” episodes here.

[Photo by George DeSota/jpistudios.]

To no one’s surprise, the winner of “America’s Got Talent” last night on NBC was ventriloquist Terry Fator. Watch the live announcement here, along with Fator’s performances and his message to his fans.

Fox’ much less viewed filmmaking competition “On the Lot” also ended Tuesday night. Its grand-prize DreamWorks contract went to Texas native Will Bigham. See his films here.

[Above: Series judge David Hasselhoff with winner Terry Fator and wife in NBC photo by Virginia Sherwood.]

It’s official -- Janeane Garofalo is joining the cast of “24” this season (which doesn’t start till January).

Fox just announced she’ll play “Janis Gold, an FBI systems analyst assigned to the team investigating the crisis befalling Jack Bauer (Kiefer Sutherland) and company” in this seventh season.

The show will again air Monday nights at 9.

DirecTV is the place to see “High School Musical 2” in HD, with 5.1 digital audio. It’ll air on DirecTV’s Ch. 101 this Friday, Aug. 24, at 6 p.m., 9 p.m. and midnight.

The 101 (what DirecTV calls it) is the original programming channel being beefed up by the satellite service. It’ll host new episodes of the ex-NBC soap “Passions” starting Sept. 17, and also features live music events and championship gaming.

Those without DirecTV can watch “HSM2” in standard def on Disney Channel again this Thursday at 8 p.m. Last year’s original “High School Musical” repeats Sunday at 9 p.m.

CBS has announced the 40 kids it collected in a New Mexico “ghost town” this spring to create their own “Kid Nation” for a new fall “reality” series (premiering Wednesday, Sept. 19 at 8 p.m.).

Turns out no Long Island parents are among those who thought this was an awwwesome idea.

On CBS’ web site, you can now meet the cast -- I mean, real-life event participants. These kids aren’t actors, no, of course not. Then they’d have to “work” fewer hours and be paid a lot more. But the site’s promo reel -- which is all that CBS has shown to TV critics at this point, too -- reveals that young players can be just as savvy as adults when it comes to the incidents, attitudes and “roles” reality producers favor.

Which isn’t to say “Kid Nation” won’t be a huge hit, as many industry analysts are expecting. But should it be? That’s the question that came up for debate at the recent TV critics' press tour, where CBS executives and series producers defended the project.

More fuel on the fire: this new story from our sister-paper Los Angeles Times talking to some of the kids, parents and series skeptics.

CNBC’S "Fast Money MBA Challenge” wraps up Wednesday at 9 p.m. with a live finale from the Nasdaq Marketsite in Times Square.

Teams from the McCombs School of Business at the University of Texas at Austin and the Yale School of Management face off to win $200,000, to be used for tuition, school loans, books and other school expenses. (Vegas trips apparently not eligible.)

The teams use virtual money to create a "Championship Portfolio" of publicly traded stocks, with grades based on actual market performance through Wednesday’s close.

CNBC started "Fast Money MBA Challenge" Aug. 1 with 32 MBA students from eight business schools. Already down for the count: Columbia Business School, NYU's Stern School of Business, the Tuck School of Business at Dartmouth, the University of Chicago Graduate School of Business, the UCLA Anderson School of Management, and MIT's Sloan School of Management.

Got a Verizon V CAST-enabled phone? Then you’ve got full-length, ad-free episodes of David Letterman and Craig Ferguson to watch on the go.

CBS just announced it’s making the previous night’s complete shows of “Late Show With David Letterman” and “The Late Late Show With Craig Ferguson” available on V CAST (preexisting $15 monthly package fee), starting Tuesday. The episodes will stream in a succession of short segments designed to maximize cell technology.

Quick highlight reels of the shows will still be available on V CAST, too, but “we’re seeing a growing demand for the availability of full length, network quality shows,” said Cyriac Roeding, executive vice president of CBS Mobile/CBS Interactive.

It’s still simpler to watch the shows on Verizon’s V CAST Mobile TV ($25 monthly and including all V CAST services), available on a limited number of handset models. That newer service runs on a schedule like regular TV, but it uses a broadcast signal rather than cell phone technology so you can watch continuously and can instantly change channels (it’s also got an interactive program guide). Letterman and Ferguson have been available there since Mobile TV launched earlier this year, alongside shows from Fox, NBC, ESPN, Comedy Central, MTV, Nickelodeon and other familiar channels. Like TV, though, Mobile TV has commercials.

That “Heroes” cast is getting crowded. “Veronica Mars” herself, Kristen Bell, has signed on to play “a sexy, intriguing, mysterious young lady who has ties to Peter’s apparent death, H.R.G.’s past and Claire’s future.”

Bell’s character, named Elle, will first appear in October for a multiple-episode arc in which she commits “a terrible crime,” says NBC.

Already reported “Heroes” cast additions for fall include ex-“Trek” hailing-frequencies officer Nichelle Nichols, as a relative who takes hero kid Micah into her New Orleans home; Dania Ramirez and Shalim Ortiz as Central American siblings; Nick D’Agosto as Claire’s new boyfriend; Japanese pop star Eriko Tamura; and David Anders (Sark on “Alias”) as Hiro’s hero, legendary samurai Takezo Kensei (yes, Anders is a white dude; we don’t get it either).

“High School Musical 2” premiered Friday night as Disney Channel as the most-watched basic cable telecast of all time.

Yes. All time. Bigger even than -- cover your ears, dad -- NFL football!

“HSM2’s” 17.2 million debut viewers eclipsed ESPN’s Monday Night Football game of last Sept. 25 (the Saints’ post-Katrina return to the New Orleans Superdome) by a whopping 1.2 million viewers.

Take that, “The Closer”! Take that, “Monk”! And take that, “Laguna Beach”!

Plus, let’s not forget, “HSM2” aired twice more over the weekend, adding yet more young eyeballs to its aggregate Nielsen numbers.

Disney’s key demos went through the roof, too. Friday’s premiere was the most watched telecast ever in kids 6-11, and the most watched entertainment telecast (behind only the 2004 Super Bowl) in tweens 9-14. It’s also, clearly, the top-ranked basic cable movie of all time.

Should you have somehow missed this momentous film, “HSM2” airs again Thursday at 8 p.m. on Disney Channel. Last year’s original “High School Musical” comes up to bat this Sunday night at 9.

ABC put “The Nine” on the air last fall. Then it yanked the hostage-taking fallout saga off the air. Then network execs promised to burn off the rest of the serial story’s 13 produced episodes this summer. Then they took those off the air.

So here’s where you “Nine” fans can go. (No, not there. That’s for ABC to say, not us.) We are now promised that ABC.com’s video player will roll out the remaining episodes this month, forthwith:

Episodes 8-11 are already posted. Episode 12 goes up Aug. 23, with the finale loading Aug. 30. They’ll remain online through Sept. 24.

While you’re at the site, you can also find some other (possibly unexpected) goodies: SOAPnet’s “GH”-spinoff “Night Shift,” ESPN’s 1977 Yankees/NYC portrait “The Bronx Is Burning,” and fellow ABC burnoffs “Six Degrees,” “Daybreak” and “The Knights of Prosperity.”

Our Hollywood Reporter pal Ray Richmond has written a fine and touching column about Merv Griffin's much-rumored identity crisis, and it comes from a personal perspective -- Richmond was a segment producer in the final '80s years of Merv's talk show.

Read this heartfelt ode if you're up for the unvarnished truth.

But can the caustic comic win the award for outstanding reality program? Bravo airs a four-episode mini-marathon of “Kathy Griffin: My Life on the D-List” this Monday night (Aug. 20, 6-10 p.m.), which asks viewers to go to the Bravo web site to answer that question. The winning vote gets posted at the end of the event.

Which episodes are included, you ask? Why, everything from Griffin visiting the troops in Iraq [Bravo photo at right] to hosting the gay porn awards, with a prison show and a London stop, too. Watch Griffin clips here.

Cable’s hot summer continues. Ratings are in for Showtime’s Monday debut of “Californication” and third-season return of “Weeds,” and they’re better than ever.

Mary Louise Parker’s acclaimed “Weeds” drew 824,000 viewers -- its biggest audience ever -- and David Duchovny’s very-adult comedy “Californication” held onto 550,000 of them, way more than “Weeds” own 2005 series premiere did.

MTV was hot, too, with Monday night's third season double-dose return of “The Hills” beating every other broadcast and cable network among viewers 12-34, scoring as MTV’s highest-rated telecast so far this year.

Less happy these days is HBO, which announced it’s canceling “John From Cincinnati,” the cosmic surf-clan saga from David Milch. Guess he can go back to those promised “Deadwood” movies now.

Other cable series debuting this summer to critical raves and solid ratings include Lifetime’s hit “Army Wives,” USA’s “Burn Notice,” AMC’s “Mad Men,” FX’ “Damages” and TNT’s “Saving Grace.”

[Above: "Weeds" photo by Cliff Lipson/Showtime.]

What a relief that Daniel Boulud’s reputation is intact: he liked Hung’s cooking. Hung didn’t win anything, but Boulud called his quick-fire burger “very good,” and Mr. Hubris' tuna tartare was probably the most successful of all the elimination-challenge dishes.

What was Daniel Boulud doing there? It wasn’t to promote his book “Letters to a Young Chef,” a hardcover copy of which he awarded to each of the contestants; the book was published in 2003.

And it wasn’t to deodorize his image after he agreed, two weeks ago, to settle a discrimination lawsuit brought against him by Latino and Asian workers at his flagship restaurant Daniel in New York who claimed that they were denied opportunities to advance to higher-paying positions within the organization; the episode was shot months ago.

In any event, he inspired the quick-fire challenge—create a knock-out burger—an homage to the burger served at his DB Bistro Moderne: A sirloin patty filled with boned short ribs braised in red wine, foie gras, black truffle and a mirepoix of root vegetables, served on a homemade bun and topped with toasted parmesan and layered with fresh horseradish mayonnaise, tomato confit, fresh tomato and frisée lettuce. The DB burger goes for a cool $29.

CJ won the challenge with a scallop-mousse-and-shrimp burger topped with tangerine. No immunity was awarded; CJ’s prize was to select his own team for the elimination challenge. He picked Tre, Casey and Brian and in an act of true humility, appointed himself sous chef and asked Tre to command the kitchen of Restaurant Alison. Which turned out to be a mistake. Tre turned out a lackluster menu distinguished by criminally over-smoked potatoes. Brian, out in front, failed to manage the room well, and set the tables with dusty plates.

Meanwhile, over at Garage, Sara M decided that she, a cheese maker if I remember correctly, would run the kitchen. Howie went along, probably thinking that she’d hang herself. In fact everyone on Team Garage except Hung hung himself. Sara presided over a heavy, un-seasonal menu, Howie turned out a leaden risotto (which Tom, correctly, pointed out should not have contained cream), and Dale made perhaps the biggest mistake of the episode—if not the season, program, the network: he festooned the dining room with vanilla-scented candles.

Both teams lost, no one was sent home, and next week they have a chance to open their restaurants a second time.

In a nod to the blogosphere, Andrea Strong of the food blog The Strong Buzz turned out to have been one of the civilian diners. Grub Street's Josh Ozersky wrote on his blog that there "was supposed to be a whole table of bloggers — Daniel Maurer and I for Grub Street, Eater, Restaurant Girl … but they wanted us to not write about Top Chef at all, and that couldn’t happen. Only Andrea took the pledge."

To read Strong's own account of the experience, click here.

Padma read aloud selections Strong’s musings at the Judges’ Table, relieving Ted of the burden of coming up with all the zingers. For more zingers, check out Anthony Bourdain’s blog.

The reunion of the century (last century, anyway) takes place next month.

That’s when Kathie Lee Gifford drops by “Live With Regis and Kelly” to mark the show’s 20th anniversary in national syndication.
You mean Reege had a co-host before Kelly Ripa? (Yeah, I know that’s like asking whether Paul McCartney had a band before Wings.)

Nevertheless, Gifford, who left as co-host in 2000, is scheduled to appear Sept. 14, when Regis and Kelly look back at the show’s most memorable moments.

There will be two weeks of memory festivities, starting on Sept. 3. My personal wish: they show the “Seinfeld” clip in which Cosmo Kramer showed up as a “Live” guest to hawk his coffee-table book (that becomes a coffee table!) and then proceeds to spill java over his hosts.

Oh, come on. You know you’ve been lusting after that “Jimmy Kimmel Live” baby T for your tot. Or perhaps that poster from Freddie Prinze’s canceled sitcom, “Freddie.” The “America’s Funniest Dog” T-shirt? Maybe the “Commander in Chief” T-shirt/campaign pin combo?

They’re all on clearance right now at the ABC TV store, an online wonderland of tube detritus.

The sale page actually has a few must-haves, too -- a “Lost” Hanso Foundation polo shirt, a fleece “Grey’s Anatomy” Seattle Grace vest, and a “Lucci For President” T-shirt, in pink, of course, honoring our local “All My Children” diva. (And it’s more than 50 percent off!)

Full-price customers choose from such goodies as a “Lost” Sawyer action figure (with raft!), “Dancing With the Stars” glitter Ts, and a “Boston Legal” Denny Crane bobblehead.

Bye, bye, Asa Buchanan. The cantankerous coot kicks the bucket this Thursday on ABC’s “One Life to Live” daytimer, necessitating a Friday funeral that brings back series grads for the soap’s 10,000th episode. (“OLTL” premiered July 15, 1968, two years before lineup-mate “All My Children” and four years after “General Hospital.”)

On hand for his Friday sendoff will be such ex-“OLTL”ers as “Firefly” star Nathan Fillion (who once played grandson Joey), Dan Gauthier (recently Joey’s brother Kevin), John Loprieno (Asa's son Cord), Tonya Walker (Asa’s ex Alex) and James DePaiva (Asa's “son”-who-wasn’t, Max). [Above in ABC photo: Fillion and Gauthier with "OLTL" star Erika Slezak.]

Phil Carey, the movie veteran who essayed Asa for nearly 20 years, refused the show’s move from regular to recurring status, so off his character gets bumped. Too bad -- his Texan trouble-making was always a welcome shot of adrenaline, even when the 82-year-old New Jersey-born actor was acting from a wheelchair after health woes. The soap benefited hugely from having a presence of his magnitude. Asa’s absence has already been felt, and the character’s official death (though nothing is ever “official” in soapland, is it?) can only dig a deeper hole.

"One Life to Live" airs locally at 2 p.m. weekdays on WABC/7. Repeats can be found on cable's SOAPnet weeknights at 9 p.m. and 2 a.m., and the following weekday at 8 a.m. Weekly marathons air Sunday 6-11 a.m.

YES network has hastily scheduled several programs paying tribute to Yankees player/broadcaster Phil Rizzuto after his Tuesday death.

Still to come:

Rizzuto’s bio on “Yankeeography” airs on YES tonight (Tuesday) at 11 p.m. (following the Yankees postgame show), and repeats three times in a row Wednesday morning (6 a.m., 7 a.m., 8 a.m.).

This week’s “Yankees Magazine” (debuting Wednesday at 11:30 a.m.) covers Rizzuto’s passing.

Check listings, see Scooter tributes at the YES network web site.

TV host/producer/composer/mogul Merv Griffin, who died Sunday, is being honored by several TV screenings.

Digital cable/satellite’s Bio channel gives Griffin the “Biography” treatment Wednesday at 9 a.m., 3 p.m. and 4 a.m.

GSN is putting together three weekend tributes to the creator of “Jeopardy!” and “Wheel of Fortune.” Saturday from 10 a.m. to 3 p.m., GSN has scheduled an early Chuck Woolery episode of “Wheel of Fortune, Vanna White’s letter-turning debut in 1982, and the show’s first road trip to New York City. Sunday’s 10 a.m.-3 p.m. lineup is a “Jeopardy!” marathon including “$1,000,000 Masters Tournament of Champions” episodes.

But best of all, GSN’s overnight black-and-white block Sunday night/Monday morning showcases two early TV games hosted by Griffin, before his talk show era. At 3 a.m., there’s Griffin’s first hosting gig on “Play Your Hunch”; this 1960 episode gives the onetime big band vocalist a chance to sing. At 3:30, there’s a 1961 “To Tell The Truth” episode with Griffin filling in for vacationing host Bud Collyer.

Ready or not, NBC is expanding the “Today” show to four hours.

The network announced the long-rumored move Tuesday, saying Sept. 10 will be the launch day for the fourth hour, 10-11 a.m.

Holding down the desks will be co-anchors Ann Curry, Natalie Morales and Hoda Kotb. Many NBC News correspondents are also expected to be contributing reports. And why do we think Matt, Meredith and Al will manage to show up the first day as well?

NBC launched its third hour (9-10 a.m.) in 2000.

I suspect Rich Collier is one of those guys we will all be hearing more about in the years to come, and maybe even in the weeks to come. Who is Rich, you ask? A few New Yorkers and aficionados of his late, lamented "Subway Q&A; with Rich Collier" on the now-defunct Metro Channel of Cablevision certainly know. It was a funky cult hit that featured Collier interviews with straphangers (as well as an extra twist - he'd pair strangers together, in a unique and no doubt ephemeral effort at subway diplomacy). It got ten local Emmys and was probably the channel's best-known show. Perhaps its only known show.

And now Collier's got another gig. He's put together a website with one of the catchier names to come my way in recent years: "Ihateyoungpeople.com." When you go there, hit the home link, and this is what pops up: "Welcome. We want you to create a video of yourself explaining what you hate the most about young people. It's your chance to rant and rave and vent about the younger generation. The most passionate and creative entries will be a part of a national cable television pilot... and all 'appropriate' submissions will be posted on the I Hate Young People video sharing site. So fire up your webcam and tell us what bugs you the most about young people!"

A YouTube for the anti-youth crowd? Not likely. I hear Collier's gotten feelers from network development types about creating a proposal. Imagine: A show that vents, or jokes, about the generational gulf on a medium that esteems youth and (nightly news programs aside) ignores anyone over fifty. Maybe Collier's onto something.

How did we miss this one till now? Huntington’s Cinema Arts Centre has the 1980 cheese treat of all time scheduled this Saturday late night!

BOTH “Xanadu” and “Flash Gordon” [above] fill the big screen from 11 p.m. Aug. 11, pairing roller skating disco with outer space football from that gloriously gilded era. Sneak peeks here and here prove it's oodles more fun than Sci Fi's limp new "Flash Gordon" series.

Much more at summercampcinema.com.

Scrabble is the latest “sport” to hit ESPN, the channel that has us already glued to such competitions as spelling bees and the rock-paper-scissor championship.

We kid you not.

ESPN will air the National School Scrabble Championship on Aug. 18 at 3 p.m. (Definitely do not make outdoor plans that day, folks.)

The promoters of the event say ESPN “truly presents the championship as a gaming spectacle, using footage of tense elimination rounds and close-to-the action camera shots (like those in televised poker).” No word whether Chris Berman will be doing the play-by-play.

And did we mention there will be some local kids among the Scrabblers? Although a show spokeswoman says it’s unclear how much camera time the youngsters will get during the final broadcast.

For the record. our home-grown boardmasters include three teams from Rockville Centre’s South Side Middle School; three teams from Hampton Bays (Elementary and Junior High); two teams from Our Lady of Victory in Floral Park and a squad from Portledge Middle School in Glen Head.

Good luck to all of you. Hope you get a lot of X’s. Z’s, J’s and Q’s.

The rumors are true: Chris Noth will reprise his role of Mr. Big in the upcoming “Sex and the City” film, according to the Hollywood Reporter.

Production on the film — written by and to be directed by the series executive producer Michael Patrick King — begin next month in New York.

Noth stars on NBC’s “Law & Order: Criminal Intent,” which also shoots in New York, and will continue to work on TV while filming his Big role.

And just in case you forgot: HBO’s “Sex” ended in 2004 with Big flying to Paris to profess his love for Carrie (Sarah Jessica Parker) and bring her back to NYC.

More importantly, we also learned that his first name was... John.

Feeling nostalgic these days for the New York City of 1977, are you?

If ESPN’s “The Bronx Is Burning” isn’t enough to bring you back to those halcyon days of serial killers, looting mobs and midget mayors, then VH1’s excellent ” “NY '77: The Coolest Year in Hell” (Saturday at 9 p.m.) is sure to satisfy your jones big time.

The VH1 doc crew has done its homework here. It's hard to believe the same channel that asks us to take Flavor Flav and Scott Baio seriously could produce such an insightful and fascinating film.

You want Son of Sam? You got him, along with the July blackout, The Koch-Cuomo-Beame-Abzug mayoral smackdown. Studio 54, Plato’s Retreat, the birth of hip-hop, CBGB.

Dig this commercial for Plato's Retreat, the Upper West Side swingers club (no, that's not where people like A-Rod and Barry Bonds hang). Don't worry, it's PG-rated.

And while you're being moved by the Spirit of '77, check out the Ramones rockin' the Bowery.

For more good, clean fun, head uptown to Studio 54, the disco where fascistic doormen ushered the high and mighty into its innards. Schlubs like you and me need not apply.

The two-hour doc is filled with commentary by such luminaries as Geraldo Rivera, Gloria Gaynor, pioneering deejay Jellybean Benitez, Richard Hell, Ed Koch (he utters the F-word!) and Jimmy Breslin (he says Times Square was better when it was full of whores instead of suburbanites going to see “The Lion King.”)

"NY ' 77" was co-written by Jonathan Mahler, author of “Ladies and Gentlemen, the Bronx is Burning,” the book on which the ESPN miniseries is based. But thankfully, there’s nothing about Reggie, Billy and the Yankees here. But there’s also nothing about the Midnight Massacre in which the Mets dumped Tom Seaver on the Reds for a bag of golf balls on June 15.

That's what I remember being most obsessed with during the summer of '77, not whether I could get into Studio 54, from which I most assuredly would be barred.

Those folks at WLIW/21 have unearthed a goodie Saturday night at 7.

They call it “Johnny Cash: A Man and His Vision,” but it’s really just a compilation of clips from Cash’s 1969-71 ABC show featuring one heckuva bunch of guest singers.

Like: Bob Dylan (I Thew It All Away), Neils Young (The Damage Done) and Diamond (Cracklin' Rosie), James Taylor (Sweet Baby James), Joni Mitchell (Long Black Veil), Creedence Clearwater Revival (Bad Moon Rising) and Derek and the Dominoes (It's Too Late). Let's not forget Cash's old Sun Records cronies, Carl Perkins (Blue Suede Shoes), Roy Orbison (Crying) and Jerry Lee Lewis (Whole Lotta Shakin' Goin' On).

Check out this amazing clip of Ray Charles performing Cash’s “Ring of Fire.” You’ll never think of that song in the same way again.

Definitely worth watching.

And now the ramp-up begins. TV networks/channels are starting to air sneak-peek rundowns of what’s coming this fall season.

On “NBC’s Fall Preview Party” (Saturday at 1:30 p.m., Sunday at 2 p.m., WNBC/4), “Heroes” star Greg Grunberg [right, with costar Ali Larter in NBC photo] hosts a half-hour of clips from such upcoming series as the “Bionic Woman” remake and the “Chuck” delight in which a big-box clerk becomes a super-secret agent. The preview will also pop up on NBC-allied cable channels (like CNBC Aug. 26 at 8:30 and 11:30 p.m.), digital cable’s on-demand service, online, and even on United airplane flights.

ABC has a fall preview special, too, but it’s not currently scheduled on WABC/7. (Philly-area viewers can watch it Saturday at 7 p.m. on WPVI/6.)

The web's TMZ celebrity scandal site comes to TV this fall in a syndicated series. The Sept. 10 arrival is teased in “TMZonTV Preview Special” (Saturday at 2:30 p.m., Sunday night at 1 a.m., WNYW/5).

This can probably be construed as good news, maybe very good news, but Robin Roberts - who underwent surgery for breast cancer just last week - will return to the air on "Good Morning America" this Monday. "Robin is expected back on 'GMA' Monday," said show spokeswoman, Bridgette Maney. "She is still awaiting her test results, but is feeling great and looking forward to getting back to work."

Back soon

Talented guy. Needs a shave.

Because David Duchovny series don't come along every day and because we've got to wait a couple more years until the next "X Files" movie, I think I'll take this little opportunity to talk about "Californication", which premieres Monday on Showtime.

He's also an executive producer of the series (inmates in charge of the asylum again!) I've had a first look and am here to tell you that this may not be the moment to finally get that Showtime subscription.

Not to be confused with that old Red Hot Chili Peppers album…actually, maybe it IS supposed to confused with that old album, because it too is about sex, death, drugs and booze. There's a lot of very dirty talk here, a requisite for HBO/Showtime comedies, and plenty of nudity (more requisites).

There's an overall "Day of the Locust" theme - the artist dreamer comes west, gets corrupted, hates himself, etc. etc. Duchovny's Hank - a blocked writer who can't "produce so much as a...predicate" - fills his days and (mostly) nights with drink, drugs and casual sex, and admits that "I'm disgusted with my life and myself, but I'm not unhappy about that..."

He wrote a book, "Good Hates us All," that was inverted into a movie ("This Crazy Little Thing Called Love") as only Hollywood can invert a movie. He's also got an ex (Natascha McElhone) whom he never actually married and a twelve-year-old daughter, too, and when he’s not dreaming about sex with nuns, Hank’s dreaming about a bucolic middle-class family life.

Problem? Duchovny wants Hank to be heroic on some level, but he's so unidimensional, and so caustically unsympathetic, that he's checkmates himself. Meanwhile, the trope of the debauched Hollywood writer who left his talent and self-esteem back in New York is so old, so over-worked, that it's now pretty much impossible to infuse freshness, much less comedy, into this kind of character, even with a guy like Duchovny at the helm.

So I still await that breakthrough comedy from this talented guy…

Who puts ice in a milkshake? Sara N., that’s who. On that basis alone she deserved to be sent packing. And it’s worth noting that control-freak Howie countenanced this crime against ice cream.

Speaking of crimes against ice cream, the scariest moment of last night’s episode was a shot of Hung chopping up cauliflower for the Cold Stone Creamery-sponsored ice-cream mix-in quick-fire challenge. Not satisfied with leaving disgusting enough alone, Hung also saddled his ice cream with candied pistachios, white chocolate, mint, tempura flakes and tamarind-brown butter sauce. The cauliflower wound up in something he called “cauliflower white-chocolate espuma.” (Marcel must have been spinning in his temperature-controlled water bath; “espuma” is Spanish for foam.)

Guest judge Govind Armstrong was being kind when he told Hung that there was too much going on in the ice cream and that it was difficult to decipher the flavors. Well, Hung had as much use for Armstrong’s opinion as he did for Alfred Portale’s. In his own mind, Hung had simply failed to create “something simple, catchy for the common people.”

The elimination challenge, which pitted Brian, Hung, Tre and Sara M. against CJ, Casey, Howie and Sara N. in a late-night bar-food contest, was pretty boring. Tre’s bacon-wrapped shrimp on cheese grits was the big winner, Sara N.’s icy shakes and under-seasoned sliders were the losers.

Yes, Sara N. deserved to go, but I agree with her and with Casey that making the women cook in their going-out finery put them at a distinct disadvantage. If the producers had wanted to level the cooking field, they should have made the men put on heels, skimpy tops and makeup.

In her final moments Sara N. showed herself to be a class act. No blubbering a la Joey, and she made an observation that should be tattooed on the forehead of every Top Chef contestant: There’s a fine line between being competitive and being an a**hole.

By the way, the great Anthony Bourdain, who is an occasional guest judge on Top Chef, is writing a blog on Bravo's web site which is nothing short of brilliant.

The top ten finalists from Fox’s hit “So You Think You Can Dance” are hitting the road for the show’s second annual live tour.

“Viewing the contestants performing on television does not even come close to experiencing them in person,” show creator Simon Fuller said in a statement.

We'll be the judge of that, sir, but the 49-city tour begins Sept. 21 in Albany with an Oct. 9 date set for Nassau Coliseum. Tickets go on sale Saturday.

This season’s champ will be crowned on the Aug. 16 show.

WLNY/55 (Ch. 10 on Cablevision) will be airing same-day editions of “Ellen” every weekday starting Sept. 3, the LI-based channel announced Wednesday.

Ch. 55 has been airing at 10 a.m. weekdays the same episode of “Ellen” that ran the previous day on WNBC/4 at 4 p.m. That might account for the strange sense of deja vu you may have experienced once in awhile.

But as of Sept. 3, the same day’s “Ellen” will air at 4 p.m. on Ch. 55. For the first week, that means “Ellen” on 55 will be airing against “Ellen” on 4.

Ch. 4 is expected to move “Ellen” to a new time slot starting the following week.

Adios, amigos.

Hey, anyone remember "The Knights of Prosperity?" Probably not - or the memory is dim and rapidly fading. "Knights" hasn't been on since February, and left the air in a cloud of grim speculation about its future. Subsequently canceled, the burnoff begins tonight in a two-parter at 8:30 and 9:30 and in a few short weeks, "Knights" will be no more.

So what exactly happened? "Knights" was absolutely one of the most promising new shows of the 2006-7 season. It had "breakthrough" written all over it - at least by ABC. Just count the many breaks that were supposed to come through: the talented Donal Logue, as the hapless leader of the would-be band of blue-collar robbers who planned to roll Mick Jagger; a star writing crew, lead by Jon Beckerman and Rob Burnett, both "Late Show with David Letterman" standouts; Dave himself, who was listed as an executive producer (and Paul Shaffer even wrote the music.) There was a terrific cast too - besides Logue, there were noteworthies like Kevin Michael Richardson, Sofia Vergara, and Lenny Venito, one of my favorites and a veteran New York actor who (I'm sure you'll remember) was "Murmurs" on "The Sopranos." Also this: It was filmed entirely in NYC, making "Knights" one of the few remaining major network shows to actually shoot on location here ("30 Rock" - not nearly as hyped - remains).

Why the downfall:

A few theories:
1.) Not that funny. Really, it wasn't. "Knights" was charming, pleasant, cute, even amusing. But funny? Hardly ever.

2.) Jagger: Missed most of his episodes, but the first one was an abomination. Show was dogged by reports, rumors, whatever, that he had demanded changes in the script and in his role. He was an executive producer too, and when the talent becomes a show-runner (like Geena Davis on "Commander-in-Chief) then you can pretty much expect the worst, and rarely be disappointed. Of course, there are major exceptions to the rule - Bill Petersen on "CSI" as the most notable. Jagger, however, is great at one thing, and that's not TV. (Meanwhile, do twenty-two year olds even know who he is? Just asking...)

3.) Concept: Robbing rich celebrities? The well-worn caper format was reduced to this one simple three-word description. Idea, though, could have probably worked better for a contained hour-thirty-minute movie. A weekly series? No. The stretch marks were especially evident when Kelly Ripa became the last victim. She was fine. Her episode was fine. But it also felt like just another version of the same joke.

Meanwhile, I think I'll pay my final respects tonight. Ray Romano makes his appearance - he was on the show way back in February, when Gene decided he'd be their next target - and you don't see Ray on the tube that much any more. The plot sounds pretty interesting too: Romano never leaves his apartment (so how to rob him?) Imagine if this episode is the breakthrough ABC has been waiting for?

We'll believe it when we see it, but the latest advance listings sent to the press by NBC for "Late Night With Conan O'Brien" include rehab-dweller Lindsay Lohan among the guests for the night of Monday, Aug. 20 (along with Larry the Cable Guy and Stephen Marley).

NBC's public web site lists Conan guests here.

MTV has just announced the nominees for the "2007 MTV Video Music Awards," airing Sept. 9 at 9, which we now dutifully reveal for our favorite music awards show (even though it's way beyond our demographic thank you very much). The big news: Justin Timberlake and Beyoncé got seven nods each, followed by five for Kanye West and Rihanna and three for Amy Winehouse received three nods. And slated performers: Timbaland, Kanye, Fall Out Boy, Lily Allen, Winehouse, Chris Brown, Foo Fighters and Rihanna. Winehouse ("Rehab"), Justice ("D.A.N.C.E."), Kanye ("Stronger"), Timberlake ("Whatever Goes Around...Comes Around"), Rihanna ("Umbrella" - what else?), and Beyoncé ("Irreplaceable") are up for video of the year.

You Know Who up for 7 VMAs. (Our sincere thanks to People for this shot.)

Who is this man? The next host of "The Price is Right?" Read on... (Courtesy, Modesto Bee)

Because Drew Carey is Suddenly the Most Important Guy on Television (SMIGOT? Hmmmm) it’s critical that we all start to learn a little more about him. That's not gonna be easy. There's so much to learn, and so little time. Where to begin? There's really nothing Carey hasn't done or said, so…

Tonight he hosts newcomer "Power of 10" on CBS, and for a quick clip, here's a reasonably okay place to go. This show could be big and I'm reasonably confident it will be for a few reasons. First, there's nothing else on. Second, people who've never heard of this guy (there are some out there) might want to check him out. Third, producer Michael Davies knows better than anyone how to make a dead-of-summer-when-nothing-else-is-on hit ("Who Wants to be a Millionaire").

The premise isn't dreadful either: It sort of tests contestants "social intelligence" on a wide range of questions both trivial and less trivial (What's the percentage of Americans who match their underwear with their outfit? The percentage who think they're smarter than Prez Bush?) Questions are based on a show-conducted poll and (like "Deal or no Deal" et al) is one of those escalating games where contestants win all-or-nothing with each question.

Winners walk away with $10 million. (Another savvy Davies' idea because $10 million winners will be non-existent, even though show will pretend someone could actually win. Right!)

Enough about the show (8 p.m., CBS). On to SMIGOT. In the spirit of the game, here are ten multiple-choice questions. It's easy! You could win a Porsche! Give it a try! Answers at bottom of this overlong blog entry! (*Source: "Dirty Jokes and Beer: Stories of the Unrefined." )

1.) Carey's second favorite city in the world, after Cleveland, is:

a.) Las Vegas
b.) Paris
c.) Miami

2.) This is because:

a.) It is close to Cuba.
b.) There's a particular Rembrandt at a particular museum that he just can't get enough of.
c.) There are many women there of easy reputation with whom to consort, and quite a bit of alcohol to ingest.

3.) Drew Carey has never ever uttered the following word:

a.) &%$&! (the word denoting the sexual act, which is not typically used on TV or even in newspapers.)
b.) Onomatopoeia
c.) Semantics

4.) Drew's character in "The Drew Carey Show" was called what during the first episode of the '96 season, sparking quite a fun little debate inside ABC:

a.) Butt head.
b.) Butt face.
c.) Butt weasel.

5.) When Ellen DeGeneres came out of the closet, Drew:

a.) Called her up to congratulate her.
b.) Watched a lesbian porno film.
c.) Insisted he'd never watch another episode of "Ellen" again.

6.) Drew likes television critics because:

a.) They liked "The Drew Carey Show."
b.) They're intelligence and hard-working.
c.) They drink heavily and will grab any free canapé on a tray that passes by them.

7.) Every chapter in his autobiography begins with:

a.) A passage from the Bible.
b.) Quotations from Thoreau.
c.) Very dirty jokes.

8.) Drew Carey is a:

a.) Maoist.
b.) Libertarian.
c.) Hillary Clinton Democrat.

9.) Drew is a former:

a.) Navy captain
b.) Marine
c.) WAC

10.) Drew is a season ticket holder to:

a.) The Los Angeles Galaxy
b.) The Los Angeles Dodgers
c.) The Long Island Rough Riders

Answers: 1.)a. 2.)c. 3.)b. 4.)c. 5.) b. 6.) c. 7.) c. 8.) b. 9.) b. 10.) a.

Make your reservations now, you “Jericho” nuts. The canceled/revived CBS series will be the object of obsessive affection at Jerichon 2007, a fan get-together near the (fictional) town site, to be held Sept. 14-16 in Oakley, Kansas.

Info about the gathering, the town, registration and more is available at the Guardians of Jericho site. (Visit the fictional Jericho at CBS’ interactive map.)

Season 1 episodes are still streaming online at CBS’ site, which promises to post video of the “Jericho” Comic-Con panel soon. CBS plans to start Season 2 at midseason.

Good old WLIW/21 has a hidden little treasure under a rock tonight, so a good thing I've turned over said rock: "Lights! Action! Music!" tonight at 9:30 is a particularly well executed doc about a particularly interesting craft - motion picture composers and their glorious art. "L!A!M!" is less a showcase for the music and more one for the art of composition itself. How do composers actually create the music for a movie? Watch on: There are a lot of interviews with major directors (Francis Ford Coppola) and major composers (John Barry, David Shire, Terence Blanchard) with each explaining why a movie wouldn't be a movie without the stuff you hear. (In a word, music conveys emotion, which is what most people are shopping for when they sit down in front of the screen, according to Coppola.) Here's Elliott Goldenthal ("Interview with a Vampire") on one youthful lesson: "My first [composition] was a porno movie - I was in my teens and, to say the least, it required a lot of music. My first lesson was stay out of the way of the movie. Write stuff that doesn't interfere with what's on screen." Viewers will wonder why their favorite score wasn't included, or at least given greater weight - John Williams' many great scores (for "Star Wars" alone), or the incredibly rich, lush, overripe oeuvre of Erich Korngold, or "On the Waterfront," or "Citizen Kane," or even "Psycho." But you may do well do remember that "L!A!M!" isn't striving for completeness as much as for understanding. And by that standard, it, ummm, scores.
Must watch or must avoid: MW. Definitely.

"Lion" queen Julie Taymor talks about the art of movie music.

Much, much, much has been written and filmed about Hiroshima and Nagasaki though it's tough to think of any of this as comprehensive or - for that matter - as grueling as "White Light/Black Rain." This is as fine a documentary on one specific aspect of the bombings - the survivors - as one could conceivably imagine, until you are told that there are 200,000 still alive today. Fourteen survivors are profiled here, which means "WL/BR" is only scratching the surface. What's best about "White Light/Black Rain" is that it's not an exercise in political finger wagging. That would have led filmmaker Steven Okazaki down a different trail than the one he intended to explore - what actually happened on those two days 62 years ago, and what has happened since. The narratives are clean and direct, and notable for almost an entire absence of emotion or even anguish. This is who we are, and who we were. This is what we saw. "I've come to realize the only reason I'm alive is to tell people what happened," said one woman who was the only student in a school with 620 pupils to survive. And another: "I realized there are two kinds of courage: The courage to die and the courage to live. Me, I chose the courage to live...I still want to live." "White Light" is filled with details so horrific that one struggles with how best to render them in simple prose: The particularly cruel disposition of the bomb, for example, to suck eyeballs out of skulls, or to liquefy human skin. Okazaki's intent is not to horrify but to remind, and you suspect that even he knows that his battle is a losing one. The hibakusha - those who survived the bomb - were discriminated against and still are (they were initially called the "pika dons," or "untouchables”). They are grim and aged reminders of one of the most horrific moments in human history, yet when young kids at a mall in Hiroshima are asked what happened on August 6, 1945, they affect blank stares before finally blurting out, “I don't know... “
Must watch or must avoid: "White Light/Black Rain" is a fascinating and often engrossing film but it is also filled with graphic images and one wonders why on earth HBO would schedule this at 7:30. It's a hard way to spend a night, which is the whole idea, I suppose.

Oscar-winner Steven Okazaki

Discovery Channel has started offering full episodes of some of its most popular series for viewing through the channel’s website. TLC and Animal Planet series are also included. “Meerkat Manor” is up now, with “Dirty Jobs” and “LA Ink” to come.

Watching the shows requires a download of Discovery’s video player (works on PC and Mac). Users can pause and choose episode chapters.

Episodes are promised online the day after they premiere on TV.

"Good Morning America" co-host Robin Roberts underwent surgery for breast cancer this morning - location undisclosed - and ABC News spokeswoman, Bridgette Maney, just released this statement: "Robin's surgery was very successful today. She has already left the hospital and is home resting. The tests following her surgery take some time to process, so when we have more information we will update you. Thank you for your thoughts and prayers for Robin at this time."

There's a lot of story behind the story of the so-called Palladium shooting, so it's best to strap yourself in and fortify yourself with a strong cup of joe, because that's pretty much what will be required of those who sit through NBC's two-hour documentary on the subject Sunday night at 7. This is the story of an obsession – of the detectives who worked the case for the better part of a decade, as well as of the NBC reporter who did the same.
David Lemus, after release in '05 (Courtesy MSNBC)

Here are just the facts: In 1990, Marcus Peterson, a bouncer at Manhattan nightclub, the Palladium, was fatally shot, and the Manhattan D.A. subsequently sought and gained convictions of the two men it argued had committed the murder, David Lemus and Olmedo Hidalgo. They went to jail, but a pair of Bronx homicide detectives, Bobby Addolorato and John Schwartz, decided to reinvestigate the case and uncovered evidence that not only exculpated Lemus and Hidalgo but also located someone they (and others) said was the real shooter, Thomas "Spanky" Morales. NBC News producer Dan Slepian followed the case, reported on its various twists and turns for both "Dateline NBC" and WNBC/4 back in 2002, and his tireless work helped win releases for both Lemus and Hidalgo.

Okay, take another sip of that coffee.

Then, the Manhattan D.A. decided that Lemus was STILL guilty and will re-try him later this year. That's the overall hook for airing this broadcast now, in the dead of summer. "In the Shadow of Justice" is billed as a "feature-length documentary," and this description is apt, insofar as this is feature length, and is conspicuously modelled after any number of films predicated on a David V. Goliath theme where power corrupts, justice is perverted, and - after the grinding efforts of average people motivated by nothing more than the belief that innocent people shouldn't be jailed - justice finally prevails. "I had faith in the system and I'll be damned if I'm gonna sit by idly on my hands and let two guys rot in jail," says Addolorato. "I gave up my career for this case and I'd do it again because it's the right thing to do." He did, in fact, give up his career for the case and is now a security guard for a New York City museum.

Another sip. And a deep breath...

"Shadow" takes viewers down a long dark hallway, with Addolorato and Schwartz as tour guides, and as far as it goes, this is an effective tour. The film asks – no, demands - that you feel their sense of blighted justice, and their sense of futility. It demands that you accept their point of view, too, and reinforces this with some powerful ballast from others involved - notably Lemus and Hidalgo (both interviewed) and a former assistant D.A., Daniel Bibb, who once argued to keep them in jail and now says on camera that he left the D.A.'s office because his bosses forced him to keep two innocent man behind bars. There's a consultant who worked on the case - Steve Cohen, who’s now chief of staff for Attorney General Andrew Cuomo - and he's got some interesting stuff to say, too: "I'll concede [the D.A.] is right 99.99 percent of the time, but if you happen to be in the .01 percent, then good luck, because you [then] happen to be David Lemus."

All of this, meanwhile, is skillfully edited into a sort of you-are-there-and-should-feel-the-pain-too" movie that is more about Addolorato's and Schwartz's obsession than the case itself. But as mentioned, someone else's obsession is someone else's obsession and probably not your’s, and it is this impassioned insistence that will leave most viewers scratching their heads before reaching for the channel changer. There's too much to digest here - too many twists and turns, too many facts, and really, too many questions left unanswered. If the D.A. still believes in Lemus's guilt, I'd like to know why. Maybe I turned away from the set in a daze now and then - Okay, I walked away in a daze - but I'm pretty certain that over two long hours no where in this film does the D.A.'s case get a full hearing. I really have no idea why they want to re-try Lemus. Blind stubbornness? Additional evidence? What?

Like most first-rate reporters, Slepian - Adam Gorfain is senior producer, Michael Nardi is field producer, and Robert Allen is editor - wants to see his story through to conclusion. And like all good reporters, he's also driven by his own sense of justice. But some viewers - me anyway - will also start to suspect he got so close to this story that he finally checked his objectivity at the door. When you become a big part of the story, as Slepian so obviously has, that’s perfectly understandable. It’s just not perfect journalism.

It’s one week and counting. But if you have tween-age kids, you already knew that.

“High School Musical 2” gets an early debut next Friday, Aug. 10, on-demand through Cablevision’s iO digital cable. Though the much-awaited sequel premieres on regular Disney Channel Aug. 17 at 8 p.m., Cablevision (and Verizon FIOS TV) customers can get the goods a week ahead of time through the Disney On Demand service. (Cablevision charges $4.95/month subscription cost; iO customers can order online or at Ch. 503.)

Other options to feed the need include Disney Channel’s online “HSM2” supersite, which offers music and video previews, podcast and poster downloads, photos, games and other goodies, plus a “party planning kit” for those en-masse viewing events. The “HSM2” soundtrack and trailer are streaming on Disney XD.

Disney has a full complement of mobile access, too, with interactive cell phone applications, ringtones, et al. In addition, Sprint Power Vision promises short-form footage and then both “HSM” and “HSM2” streaming on Disney’s mobile channel.

Let’s not even get into the gazillions of Disney Channel “HSM2”-related events -- cast BBQ, live chat, singalong, etc. -- planned for premiere weekend Aug. 17-19. (But if you must know, click “Continue” below for all the details.)

By the way, last year’s original “High School Musical” smash is currently available on-demand free at iO’s Ch. 500, in the Family category.

[Above: "HSM2" cast photo by Bob D'Amico/Disney Channel.]

Continue reading "HOT TO WATCH: ‘HSM2’ countdown is on" »

Now it’s all Lindsay, all the time, isn’t it?

La Lohan’s most recent misbehavior -- that's last week's Santa Monica police mug at the right -- provides handy programming for VH1, which has hurriedly scheduled “Lindsay Lohan’s Hollywood Trainwreck” tonight (Friday at 9:30 p.m., 11:30 p.m. and 2 a.m.) and over the weekend (Saturday at 11:30 a.m., Sunday at 6 p.m. and 1 a.m.).

Check for other showtimes here.

Among the just-announced contestants on NBC’s weight-loss competition, “The Biggest Loser,” which returns on Sept. 11 are two Long Islanders: 40-year-old twin brothers Bill and Jim Germanakos.

The Germanakos are the first set of twins to compete on the show.

Bill, of Lynbrook, is married with three kids and works in medical sales. Jim, of Massapequa, also married with three kids, is a police officer. In his free time, he’s a volunteer firefighter and can be caught singing Sinatra songs at the local Italian bistro. Their goal, according to NBC, is not to become the “fat twins.”

Well here I sit, exactly one week after the end of 2007 Press Tour, and if I close my eyes, I can still smell the chill, filtered air of the International Ballroom at the Beverly Hilton. Over to the left! The silver tureens of coffee...Over to the right! The claque of network executives, awaiting innocent passerby’s (critics) to ensnare... And straight ahead: A forest of laptops opened and ready, reflecting in their many screens the blear-eyed stone-cold gaze of a critic who is about to hear (yet again) why a star just had to come out of retirement for a fabulous new show, or why a producer decided to insert a particular scene in a particular drama that everyone (him included) pretty much knows will be canceled by October.

It's terribly easy to lampoon the institution of the "Press Tour" and pretty much everyone has - it's been grand sport for years, by other critics, attendees, the networks, and loftier scribes who wouldn't be caught dead at this "long, brutal, mind-deadening schnorr..." But I was caught dead there - for two straight weeks, a strangling member of this death march with cocktails, in Tim Goodman's (of the San Francisco Chronicle) memorable phrase. But after eight long years away, I also came away with some other impressions. And here they are:

Observation No. 1: Deeper respect.- Yes, I have a deeper respect for my fellow scribes, who work this confab with urgency and professionalism that is both admirable and often quixotic. They tilt valiantly, and honestly, at the windmills erected by the networks, and do so well knowing that most of what they are hearing is utter, inarguable, inescapable BS. They prod and they poke. They seek an entrance, a ray of light, a scrap of genuine information that can justify why they are here and why this is meaningful. And they do it knowing full well the futility of the effort most of the time.

So why are they here anyway? The value of the press tour, I've determined, is an “atmospheric” one as opposed to an informational one: By osmosis, the attendee absorbs so much stuff - crap and all - that he or she gets a richer, more nuanced picture of exactly what is going on in television, along with all the various forces that that are shaping it. It's useless to gauge the press tour as a pure information-generating exercise - although there is, in fact, a vast amount of information piled on. Reason is, much of the information is as ephemeral as a fish carcass - rotting almost from the minute it's tossed on the beach. Cast/script/schedule
changes happen constantly, and what a star or producer says one minute is often obsolescent a minute or an hour later. Moreover, everyone's coached, so their words lack - as it were - both spontaneity and authenticity. (Which is really a very nice way of saying that large swathes of most sessions are a crock.)

Observation No. 2: Paranoia: This press tour dripped with it - a sense of fear, obsolescence, irrelevance, and anxiety seemed to creep into every conversation. There was a pervasive sense that the critical beast - the newspaper legman or woman who conveys information and opinion about comes over the nation's airwaves or cable wires - is doomed, much as the institution of network TV may be doomed (not to mention the very print papers they work for).

That's an overstatement, but you get the idea: Change is everywhere and the critics here are scrambling to adapt to it. The best I could tell, many are adapting remarkably well - almost all were blogging, and all (best I could tell) seemed to embrace the idea that change and adaptation were as much a part of their job description as reviewing.

But here's the fundamental problem, and the press tour perfectly captures their inescapable plight: There is so much stuff everywhere, from viral videos to bad sitcoms, that it's beyond the grasp of even the most competent critic or TV writer to absorb it all. We're now mere bystanders, wondering what readers - if they still exist - want, while fully suspecting that most have already set their media table, and we don't even have a seat at it. Readers - that mythic creature again - rely on RSS feeds for their news, a dozen websites for entertainment news, and a myriad others for streaming video.

And there we sit, listening to Lucy Liu talk about what dress she'll wear in "Cashmere Mafia" or whether Jeff Foxworthy talks to the kid contestants before they get on the air. We stare into our laptops and Sancho Panza stares back.

Anyway, the critics - 150 or them by my count - worked with passion and diligence. Most clearly love TV and clearly believe that they'll figure a way out of their current crisis. It's my hope - and maybe even my belief - that we will.

Lucy in the sky with press critics. And what WILL she wear this fall?

What product is Rocco DiSpirito hawking? That’s what I started wondering as soon as I learned he was to be a guest judge on Top Chef.

As it turns out, he was promoting Bertolli Mediterranean-Style Frozen Dinners, a sample of which landed on my desk just a few days ago. Sadly, it had defrosted by the time I got to it so I haven’t taken it for a test drive. Bertolli’s flaks had also, as is the custom with food p.r., sent along some low-level graft—a nonstick skillet, a wooden spoon, a pot holder and a corkscrew.

Bertolli, a once-Italian olive-oil company now owned by food behemoth Unilever, dug deeper into its pockets to run two commercials during the show’s airing and put up four tickets to Italy for the team that won the elimination challenge.

Could there have been a weirder challenge? I was worried that the contestants were going to have to cook something with Bertolli’s frozen dinners, but instead they were instructed to deconstruct Bertolli’s handiwork and then create their own. Creating frozen dinners!

And now the public has been introduced to the great concept of IQF, Individual Quick Freezing. Remember the days when frozen peas came in an icy block? That was pre-IQF. Now blanched fresh peas are placed on a conveyor belt and rolled into an incredibly cold blast freezer that instantly freezes each one—that’s why they rattle around in the package. The quicker you freeze something, the less its texture is affected by being frozen and then defrosted.

The Top Chefs didn’t have access to a commercial blast freezer, but they could still achieve some measure of IQF by freezing each of their dish components separately. Only Tre and CJ got it right—and they were rightfully declared the winners.

Rocco DiSpirito, the Icarus of the culinary world, is best known for having been plucked from his well-regarded Manhattan restaurant Union Pacific to star in a reality series that chronicled his doomed efforts to open an Italian restaurant with Mephistophelean partner Jeffrey Chodorow. A short stint as host of WOR’s Food Talk radio show followed.

Padma, however, introduced him as “James Beard Award winner and author of Rocco’s Real-Life Recipes.” None of the contestants seemed particularly impressed with him, and Tom seemed downright dismissive. At one point Rocco made the staggering pronouncement that “among the great chefs of the world there is a recognition that home-meal-replacement [i.e. frozen dinners] is an important category.”

Yeah, right. Great chefs of the world like Rocco are hawking frozen dinners for Unilever, and pikers like Tom Colicchio are creating ground-breaking restaurants (Craft, Craftbar, ‘wichcraft, Craftsteak), writing excellent cookbooks and actually bringing some class to reality TV.

Because some of us just can't face the fall without having wallowed in all its overnight wonder, here's the just-out press release on this year's Jerry Lewis telethon:

MDA LAUNCHES 42ND LABOR DAY TELETHON

TUCSON, Ariz., Aug. 1, 2007 — Comic legend Jerry Lewis joins friends and entertainers this Labor Day weekend for his 42nd annual Telethon to benefit the Muscular Dystrophy Association.

Originating from the South Point Hotel, Casino & Spa in Las Vegas, the live show will air for 21½ hours, beginning at 9 p.m. EDT, Sunday, Sept. 2, and will be shown on some 190 “Love Network” stations nationwide. Check www.mda.org for stations and start times.

The broadcast raises funds for MDA’s programs of research and healthcare services for children and adults affected by one of more than 40 neuromuscular diseases in MDA’s program. It’s expected to attract some 40 million viewers nationwide and many more worldwide via MDA’s Web site, www.mda.org, and Real Networks.

As MDA’s number-one volunteer, Lewis has spent the past year preparing to make the 2007 show the most successful ever.

“I’ll never wave the white flag in the fight against muscular dystrophy and other muscle-wasting diseases,” Lewis said. “Not only is the Telethon a chance to help put an end to these debilitating diseases, but it’s also a way to inform and educate the public, while having a darn good time.”

Lewis will share the stage with MDA Board member Ed McMahon, who will return for his 40th year as Telethon anchor.

Jann Carl of “Entertainment Tonight,” Tom Bergeron of “America’s Funniest Home Videos” and “Dancing with the Stars,” Alison Sweeney of “Days of Our Lives” and “The Biggest Loser” and comedians Norm Crosby and Bob Zany will serve as co-hosts. (Carl, Crosby and Bergeron are MDA national vice presidents.) Award-winning recording artist and MDA National Youth Chairman Billy Gilman will perform and host special youth segments.

Telethon entertainment will include singers, dancers, comedians, bands and novelty acts sure to appeal to diverse interests and generations.

Several remote performances will be aired from New York and Chicago.

Each hour, MDA “Love Network” stations will cut away from the national broadcast to present information about local services and families served by the Association. Both national and local segments will feature videotaped profiles and live interviews with individuals and families affected by neuromuscular disease.

During the 2006 MDA Telethon, pledges and donations brought in a record $61 million. Lewis says that, as always, his goal for 2007 is to surpass that total by one dollar.

Saturday’s the day for NYC auditions for the next cycle of the CW hit “America’s Next Top Model.” Open casting calls take place at Park Central New York (870 Seventh Ave., at 56th Street) from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. Aug. 4.

Applicants should be women ages 18 to 27, with a minimum height of 5-feet-7. More eligibility details and application forms available here.

If you miss this casting stop, you can try Binghamton on Aug. 9, or such subsequent far-flung locales as Boston, Norfolk, Shreveport, Orlando, Seattle, Chicago, Anchorage or Erie, Pa.

The venerable CNET technology brand has come to Cablevision’s iO digital cable on-demand service.

Ch. 607 now offers anytime viewing of short videos featuring tech tips, product reviews, news and commentary, and TV versions of such popular online shows as “Insider Secrets.”

CNET still offers daily online video updates, news and gadget tips at its online CNET TV site, too.

Well here's a shock - or as shocking an occurrence as the moment that red ball of fire poked its head over the horizon this morning at around 5:30 a.m.: Whoopi Goldberg's the new host of "The View."

Thus ends the speculation (though hardly fevered) and the guesswork (evidently well-informed) that swirled in the wake of Rosie's wonderfully tempestuous departure just a couple of months ago. Whoopi was logical for any number of reasons: 1.) Lives locally; 2.) Has a vaguely controversial rep, with smatterings of both liberal and right-leaning opinions (hence a little safer than Ro); 3.) Knows how to do a talk show since she did one before, and has been on this one five million times; 4.) Still has some notoriety and fame even though her screen career has long since gone into eclipse; 5.) Almost certainly is liked by Babs, though of this one can never be entirely certain; 6.) Won't step all over everyone else's lines, and may even get along with Elisabeth; 7.) Won't alienate vast segments of the viewing public with endless and obvious diatribes about Bush, or Cheney, or the failed war, or Trump, or Kelly, or whatever else turned Rosie into a monumentally annoying hairshirt (though one can expect obvious potshots at Bush on various occassions, since that is what Whoopi does); 8.) Can be funny and bright, which - after all - are nice qualities to bring to this show.

It all came down just a few minutes ago on the show when Babs - in a paroxysm of hyperbole - introduced the new host as "brilliant, funny...Oscar-winning actress...Broadway superstar..Etc. Etc." Whoopi!!

Even Whoopi indicated that the secret of her impending arrival was so open that
only her mother didn't know about it: "I love this show, love hanging out with you guys, so this is a big old thrill for me, but people were going crazy - had to take the phone off the hook. My mother [calls], 'Is it true?' "I don't know what you mean' [said Whoopi to mom] Fortunately she lives in San Francisco so she couldn't see me lying through my teeth..."

Whoopi seemed to indicate, or promise, that she wouldn't become a trainwreck like Ro - you know, battling with celebrities, telling Elisabeth she's a bimbo, pushing Babs off her chair, stuff like that: "I want to assure the audience, this is a very straight-up show.." Babs: "I don't want that!" Whoopi: "I know you want me a little edgy, but someone said to me, you've become so nice. I guess the truth is, I've always been nice..."

OK, welcome aboard, Whoopi. Be nice. Make Babs happy. And above all, don’t for a minute forget who’s boss.

Said Babs, she'll join the show "permanently" after Labor Day. Of course, "permanent" is always a relative term in the firmament of "The View."

Shocked, shocked to learn that she is the next host of "The View" (courtesy USA Today.)

Acclaimed series including “Iconoclasts” and “Live From Abbey Road” get a new high-definition showcase Wednesday nights.

Universal HD is launching a weekly Sundance Channel program block Wednesday at 8 p.m., to continue through the end of the year.

Tonight’s first-night lineup features an 8 p.m. “Iconoclasts” interview between actor Samuel L. Jackson and basketball giant Bill Russell; “Big Ideas for a Small Planet” (9 p.m.), exploring “green” concepts through segments featuring ethanol racing cars and vegetable oil fuel recycled from a fried chicken party; and 9:30’s “Abbey Road” concert with John Mayer, Norah Jones and Richard Ashcroft.

Preview video here.